Brain Freeze

My brain (PDA) died last night. For those who know the real, in the flesh CG, you know this is no small thing. I use that thing so much. If I look up an address or phone number, it is in there. If I need to remind myself to take the eggs in the incubator out of the turner, I set its alarm. If the home school moms get together and decide off the cuff what the themes for activity meetings will be for the next year, I write it down in there and never lose it, can always find it. It had a low resolution digital camera which was the coolest because I always had a camera with me. Everyone’s birthday is in there (although I almost always still forget, sorry, except for my own kids). Lists so I know, on those rare occasions when I go to the mart, what to get. Lists for everything else. Records of menstrual cycles, mine and the cow’s. When the puppies were born. A calculator. Notes to myself.

I’m a bit traumatized by it. I keep thinking, “It is only a thing. Things are not important.” But then I start to do something and reach for the thing and it won’t turn on. It is just a thing. A piece of paper will work as well. If I could find that damn scrap I started that damn list on last night.

Husband came up with a plan. He will start an instrument and when it sells, we will take that money and go buy me a new brain. A brain with not only a digital camera but an MP3 player. He told me his plan and I cried. I do not have to have this thing.

It is just a thing. Things are not important. I do not have to have this thing. But I’d really really like to.