Saturday, September 08, 2007

Knowing What's Important

My mother died. Depending on what you define as “sick”, she either was sick for 15 years or about two weeks. This week has been a month long. August must have lasted at least a year. And was over in the blink of an eye.

We still have to eat of course, and when you get us too far from the farm for too long, it can become quite difficult. My in-laws took us out after the funeral which was a real godsend, and the day between her death and the receiving of friends, I baked those roosters and bread, and made butter and cheese, and that pretty much got us through.

Originally uploaded by Contrary Goddess.

Times like these, you know how important food is.

And in this time, this most difficult time, what a comfort the milking routine has been. Solid. A meditation. Peace. Constant. An anchor. And that, my friends, is life on the farm, with the family, who are my rocks.

There is this star I see every night. It is bright and steady and in the southern sky moving west but I don't know what it is. There is a very red, smaller star directly under it, and I can see them both early. After milking I stop and look. And in the looking that part of the sky breaks up, every night, and shows an even pattern behind those stars, like you held up a black piece of cloth with a light behind it, and the light was coming through the weave. I keep wondering if I can step through it, like Alice in Wonderland. I do believe it is the solidity of the daily chores that allows that kind of intimacy with the otherworld.


Vashti said...

I'm sorry for your loss.

barefoot gardener said...

Sorry to hear of your loss.

patsy said...

i am so sorry , as for the whore of babylon, i am begining to think all the present day churchs are whores, me i was raised a baptist. you are home now and can start to heal.
i am going to be ceremeted. all ready paid in full.

CG said...

Oh, I have nothing against ALL baptists. The whole "thing" of Baptists is supposed to be the priesthood of believers.

But IMO all organized religion (that is ALL) is the whore of Babylon because spirituality is not religion, and religion serves power ultimately.

To stand outside of power is, hmm, it is really what life on the farm is about.

patsy said...

ok, let talk about the whore of babylon, babylon is world goverment. the whore lays down with babylon for money or power, which brings gold and silver.
the whore is dressed in beatiful garments but she has blood on her and it is the blood of the saints.
all organissed relegion in this day as far as i can see has sold out for money.organised religion is used to kill other people of other countries. our president prays he says and our goverment kills in the name of religion.
Jesus said come out of her, the great whore, less you have part of her destruction!
I try to stay off these subjects but sometimes i just can't.

CG said...

you are fine Patsy. I rather agree with Toby Keith, that there are some things worth fighting for but I pray for peace every night. And I would say that our government doesn't kill in the name of religion but in the cause of oil which I say all citizens who are not living extremely alternative lifestyles are complicit in (protesters of war often most of all). Now, the jihadists kill in the name of religion. But it really isn't that much different than in the cause of oil.

Again, standing outside of power, not allowing power to be used against me and not causing power to be used over others, is the most powerful (says I) place to be.

thingfish23 said...

You have what you need. Peace, rest, good food, good habits.

You know where I'm at, both on the 'Net and on this subject.

There's not much else to say.

In my thoughts, cg and family


CG said...

thanks tf, you are a sweetie. I remember you lost your father this year, so it is fresh. I went by my dad's stone today. That's been 7 years. I asked him if he met her, showed her around. I asked him if he apologized to her. Funny the things in a mind. I wonder, too, if she apologized to him. They would sometimes spit and shake at the thought of each other and yet had been married, rather happily mostly, for 33 years. Life is strange.